Do Women Enjoy Receiving Oral Sex?

Some men proudly proclaim their love for providing oral sex, while others, like DJ Khaled, have made headlines for their staunch refusal. “A woman should praise the man — the king,” he infamously proclaimed in a 2015 interview. “If you holding it down for your woman I feel like the woman should praise.”

His comments sparked a flurry of reactions online, but one perspective was notably absent: his wife’s. Does she feel shortchanged? Is she simply not interested in oral sex?

While we can’t speak for her, we can explore the broader question: Do women enjoy receiving oral sex? We asked a few women to share their thoughts and delved into what the research says about how women perceive cunnilingus. Keep reading to uncover their insights and what science reveals about this intimate topic.

Not all women like oral sex, but research shows that it can be a major turn-on for some. Studies suggest that oral sex can increase a woman’s chances of having an orgasm (due to clitoral stimulation), support relationship quality, and potentially improve her health.

According to a 2016 study of 899 university students, 73 percent of men and 69 percent of women reported that receiving oral sex felt "very pleasurable." However, more women reported giving oral sex to their partners (59 percent vs. 52 percent), and more men reported receiving oral sex from their partners (63 percent vs 44 percent).

A 2018 study on older adults found that oral sex was still popular, with 37 percent of couples having performed it within the previous year. For both men and women, receiving oral sex is linked to a higher chance of having an orgasm and more sexual enjoyment, which can lead to more intimacy and improved relationship quality. This may be true for some men who experience sexual dysfunctions like erectile dysfunction (ED) or low libido, as giving oral sex allows them to provide sexual pleasure to their partners without the challenges of penetrative sex.

Another study of American women aged 18-92 found that both giving and receiving oral sex were associated with better self-rated health for the respondents.

We asked a few women if they liked oral sex and how often they were having it. Here’s what we found out:

Oral Sex Gives Her a Bigger Orgasm

Did you know there’s an orgasm gap between men and women? According to a 2024 study, 82 percent of men had orgasms during their most recent sexual encounter compared to just 32 percent of women.

Oral sex is one way to close this gap by providing direct stimulation to a woman’s clitoris and extending foreplay (the build-up to the main event).

“The orgasm is different and very intense and pleasurable,” said Sarah, a 37-year-old manager from Chino, CA. “He gets his tongue all up in there and wants me to crush his head like a grape.”

Suzy, a 32-year-old nurse from the U.K., likes the slow build to orgasm the most, which she said often leads to a “full body orgasm.”

Oral Sex Increases Intimacy

In a 2018 study of 134 participants in long-term relationships, higher levels of intimacy were linked to higher sexual desire in both men and women and higher odds for partnered sexual activity to occur.

Oral sex is one way to build intimacy.

For Marie*, a 19-year-old non-binary warehouse worker, receiving great oral sex isn’t just about physical pleasure. “Besides the pleasure aspect, it just feels comfortable and passionate to have someone between my legs making me feel good. To play in someone’s hair while they’re french kissing my labia and clit is a peak sexual experience for me.”

For Rebecca, a 65-year-old CEO from Australia, oral sex is only enjoyable when it’s with someone she’s been “intimate with for a while.”

They Want Oral Regularly, and They Don’t Mind Asking For It

Some studies show that women can feel self-conscious about receiving oral sex due to body image concerns. This may prevent them from requesting or enjoying oral sex fully or wanting to have it regularly.

But for the women we talked to, it was clear that they wanted oral sex regularly, with responses ranging from “once a month” to “as often as possible.”

Sarah takes a playful approach to requesting oral from her partner. “I let him know I’m freshly shaven and the way he gets turned on gets me turned on also.” She also has no problem returning the favor and finds blowjobs just as enjoyable.

Suzy takes a more educational approach. “I don’t have a regular partner, but with new partners, it’s very much a ‘Welcome to my TED talk on how to make me cum.’”

In fact, research shows that this kind of sexual assertiveness often works in the woman’s favor. A 2011 study found that sexual assertiveness was linked to having more cunnilingus partners over a lifetime. Females who initiated cunnilingus at younger ages were also more likely to engage in sexual intercourse for personal gratification instead of taking on a more subservient role.

Not Performing Oral Sex Isn’t a Dealbreaker

Nobody should feel obligated to perform a sexual act they don’t feel comfortable with. But for some women, dating someone who doesn’t perform oral sex is a dealbreaker, especially if he, like DJ Khaled, expects fellatio himself.

For Sarah and Suzy, receiving oral sex from their partner was a sexual need. It didn’t have to be performed every time they had sex, but it couldn’t be off the table entirely.

Marie* was a little more lax about it. They said they were willing to date someone whether they performed oral sex or not.

Every woman responds differently to oral sex. Some might want light pressure and low speed, while others want it hard and fast. Being open with your partner and asking questions about what they like is the easiest way to make sex more pleasurable for them.

Next time you perform oral sex, try the following:

• Educate yourself on female anatomy. Find out where the clit is, how to reach the G-spot, and how to stimulate a woman’s erogenous zones. You can’t give her the best sex of her life if you don’t know what you’re working with.

• Use fingers and sex toys. Your tongue is an excellent tool, but there are many others you can try. For example, you can insert a dildo or your fingers while you stimulate her clit with your tongue, or you can hold a vibrator against her clit while you penetrate her with your tongue.

• Experiment with different speeds and pressures. This is where a vibrator can make your life easier. You can try different vibrational settings and see how she responds, typically starting with light pressure and increasing as you go to build tension. Her moans, wetness, or body language will tell you if you’re on the right track.

• Try the 69 sex position. You pleasure her, and she pleasures you—it’s a win-win. This classic sex position allows you both to enjoy oral pleasure at the same time.

• Stay safe. Practice safe sex, whether penetrative or oral. Dental dams are the most popular form of protection when performing cunnilingus, and it’s easy to make your own. Simply cut both ends off a regular condom so that it appears like a tube. Then cut vertically down one side, so you have a flat piece of material to place over the vagina.

Research shows that most women enjoy getting oral sex, even if they don’t explicitly request it. Talking about sex openly and regularly is the best way to find out if your partner’s sexual needs are being met and what else you can do to please her. Here’s what we know:

• Oral sex can result in bigger and better orgasms. Oral sex allows you to provide direct stimulation to the clitoris, which may not always be possible through penetrative sex alone. This can increase your partner’s chances of having an orgasm.

• Oral sex can also increase intimacy. Some women find the experience passionate and intimate, resulting in peak sexual experiences.

• Trying new tactics may improve your oral skills. Your tongue is a great tool, but it’s not the only one. Try sex toys, use your hands, and ask for her input to make sure you’re on the right track.

As we said before, oral sex can also be a great tool if you find penetrative sex challenging due to erectile dysfunction or another sexual issue. If you think there’s room for improvement when it comes to your erections, find out more about what ED treatments are available.

This article is for informational purposes only and does not constitute medical advice. The information contained herein is not a substitute for and should never be relied upon for professional medical advice. Always talk to your doctor about the risks and benefits of any treatment. Learn more about our editorial standards here.