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Enjoy sex like you used to
Some research suggests that premature ejaculation affects up to 30 percent of men, making it one of the most common sexual dysfunctions. So, if you feel like you’re not in tune with your ideal sexual stamina, you’re not alone. And you’re also not stuck — most cases of premature ejaculation (PE) are treatable.
Learning how to stop premature ejaculation can involve a mix of behavioral strategies and medications. For instance, it could include antidepressants, erectile dysfunction (ED) medications, kegels, therapy, or certain techniques that you can use during sex.
Read on to learn how each method to fix premature ejaculation can work alone or together to keep you in the saddle longer.
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Before you worry about how you stack up, consider the facts: Unlike the feature-length performances in pornography, research shows that the average guy lasts between four and seven minutes during vaginal sex.
Although premature ejaculation can hurt relationships, studies show that the root of a female partner’s frustration is not always about how long her partner lasts. According to one study of nearly 1,500 women, researchers found that women of partners with PE expressed more frustration about how focused men were on delaying ejaculation than over the length of sex.
In other words, putting more attention on the length of sex and less attention on your partner may cause the very relationship issues you’re hoping to avoid.
Fortunately, PE is highly treatable, and this can relieve some of the stress.
If you have premature ejaculation and think medication may help you, it’s best to contact a healthcare professional, like a urologist, to talk about your options. Generally, they will point to one of a wide range of PE treatments that include everything from medication and desensitizing agents to masturbation and control exercises.
Note: These tips are not intended for pre-cum, or pre-ejaculate, which is a clear fluid emitted from the penis when you’re aroused or having sex. You can’t learn how to stop pre cum because it’s outside of your control. But you can learn how to stop ejaculation, which we’ll share below.
Research shows that antidepressants prescribed off-label can help to slow ejaculation and prolong sex for men with PE.
In a study published in the journal Therapeutics and Clinical Risk Management, men suffering from premature ejaculation were prescribed either paroxetine, fluoxetine, or escitalopram.
All three of these drugs are selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs), which are usually used to treat depression and anxiety disorders.
The drugs were administered to study participants in the morning for four weeks, after which the men treated with SSRIs showed improvements in sexual function and a reduction in premature ejaculation severity using a validated questionnaire.
Interestingly, there was no difference in results between the different drugs, suggesting that all three of the SSRIs used in the study could be effective in stopping premature ejaculation.
SSRIs require a valid prescription, meaning you must talk to a licensed healthcare provider to use this type of medication. Also keep in mind that in some cases, SSRIs can cause side effects that you should be aware of before beginning treatment.
Hims offers access to treatment for premature ejaculation, following a consultation with one of the licensed healthcare professionals on our platform.
Some medications for erectile dysfunction, such as sildenafil (the active ingredient in Viagra®), may help prolong sex and reduce your risk of experiencing another sexual dysfunction: premature ejaculation.
One study published in the International Journal of Urology found that men with premature ejaculation experienced more improvements from sildenafil than they did from the SSRI paroxetine or the squeeze technique (more on that later).
Another small study also found that a daily dosage of tadalafil (Cialis®) produced a modest increase in intravaginal ejaculatory latency time (the time it takes to reach ejaculation during sex) in men with erectile dysfunction.
In addition to sildenafil and tadalafil, other medications designed to treat ED include vardenafil (Levitra®) and avanafil (Stendra®).
Although these study findings are promising, it’s important to understand that research into the effects of ED medications for premature ejaculation isn’t comprehensive right now.
Our guide to sildenafil for premature ejaculation goes into more detail about how common ED medications work, as well as their potential effectiveness as treatments for PE.
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Several topical treatments are available for premature ejaculation, including creams and sprays that contain anesthetics. These medications are designed to be applied to the head of your penis, and they can change your penis’s level of sensitivity, allowing you to last longer during sex.
Common ingredients in topical creams, sprays, and other medications for premature ejaculation include lidocaine, benzocaine, and prilocaine.
Research shows that these topical anesthetics applied to the head of the penis are effective.
One 2023 study found that men who used a lidocaine-prilocaine treatment just five minutes before sex were able to have sex for longer and have more control over their time to ejaculation.
Another study published in the International Journal of Impotence Research found that men with PE who used a lidocaine spray before sex experienced a statistically significant improvement in time to ejaculation and sex frequency over eight weeks.
In short, using lidocaine not only reduced the severity of PE but also resulted in more sexual encounters overall.
Some topical anesthetics are available over the counter, like these delay wipes with benzocaine.
If you’re prone to premature ejaculation, you may benefit from using climax control condoms, which are specifically designed to delay ejaculation.
These types of condoms are sometimes described as “extended pleasure” condoms. They tend to be slightly thicker than regular condoms and sometimes have a mild topical anesthetic applied to the side of the condom that comes into contact with your penis.
In addition to potentially slowing down time to ejaculation, using condoms provides an additional layer of protection against many sexually transmitted infections (STIs).
Can surgery stop premature ejaculation? There are a few different surgeries available to treat premature ejaculation. However, the International Society for Sexual Medicine (ISSM) doesn’t recommend these options.
In their estimation, the risk for permanent damage and loss of sexual function could be too great, according to a review published in the journal Translational Andrology and Urology.
As discussed in our guide to the causes of premature ejaculation, psychological causes, such as anxiety or guilt about engaging in sexual behavior, may contribute to sexual problems like PE.
If your premature ejaculation is mental health-related or due to relationship problems, you may benefit from therapy and/or counseling.
In a small study published in the National Journal of Andrology, men suffering from premature ejaculation were treated through a six-time course of behavioral therapy, two to three times per week. Afterwards, the men were able to last longer before reaching orgasm and ejaculating during sex. The men who took part in the study and their partners also reported higher levels of sexual satisfaction.
The men in the study also reported lower levels of sexual performance anxiety and nervousness — factors that can often contribute to premature ejaculation and other sexual performance issues.
Research published in the journal Translational Andrology and Urology also shows that a mix of psychotherapy and medication is often more effective at stopping premature ejaculation than medication alone.
Several different forms of therapy are used to treat premature ejaculation and other issues that can affect your sexual health, including sex therapy and cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT).
Counseling and therapy are often combined with other treatments, such as medication, to help you overcome early ejaculation and improve your sexual experiences.
In addition to options like medication and therapy, several behavioral techniques can be used as treatment options to prevent premature ejaculation, including simple techniques performed during sex.
One of the oldest tricks in the book, the stop-start technique is exactly what it sounds like: A premature ejaculation management option where you stop sexual intercourse, then start again when you’re not about to cum. Then, repeat the process until you’re ready to ejaculate.
You can practice the stop-start technique with your partner or by yourself.
Using this process can also help you eventually feel more confident in your ability to control your orgasm and not ejaculate too quickly.
As simplistic as the stop-start strategy sounds, research shows that it’s a relatively effective way to address premature ejaculation in the short term. For example, one scientific review found that 45 to 65 percent of men with premature ejaculation report benefits from this technique.
However, there’s relatively little data available on the long-term results of using the stop-start technique.
But since the stop-start strategy doesn’t involve any medications or costly medical treatments, it’s a helpful first option for addressing premature ejaculation.
Another common technique used to manage premature ejaculation is the “squeeze” or “pause-squeeze” technique.
During sex, as you’re approaching orgasm and ejaculation, you (or your partner) should firmly squeeze the area between the shaft and glans of your penis to stop you from ejaculating. Although there’s no exact amount of time that you should squeeze your penis, most resources suggest around 30 seconds.
By using the squeeze technique, you can delay orgasm and ejaculation several times, allowing you to stop ejaculating too soon.
Like the stop-start technique, the squeeze method is generally effective but has certain downsides. Since it results in a stop in your sexual activity and pleasure, it may become an annoyance for both you and your partner.
Additionally, during the brief stop in sex, you may develop a weaker erection — something that might affect your sexual performance and enjoyment if you’re prone to erectile dysfunction.
Want to learn how to stop quick release naturally? Simply masturbate shortly before you plan to have sex.
While there’s no scientific evidence to support this method, many men find that masturbation shortly before sex is an effective way to delay orgasm and prevent premature ejaculation.
The idea behind this approach is that during the refractory period (a recovery phase that occurs after orgasm), most men won’t be able to orgasm for a little while.
Despite the relative lack of evidence, this is a simple, free, and low-risk method you can try to slow the process of reaching orgasm and increase your sexual stamina.
You probably think kegel exercises are exclusively for women, but there's research out there to suggest that kegel exercises can help increase ejaculatory latency and prevent premature ejaculation in men.
For example, a 2014 study found that men who performed pelvic floor muscle exercises for 12 weeks developed greater control over their ejaculatory reflex and increased their average time to ejaculation during sex.
Other research published in the journal Physiotherapy found that pelvic floor muscle exercises may help improve other sexual performance issues, such as erectile dysfunction.
Our detailed guide to kegel exercises lists techniques to train your pelvic floor muscles (the ones that help you stop your pee midstream) for better sexual function and performance.
Sometimes, changing what you think about during sex can help delay orgasm, so you can avoid ejaculating prematurely.
This mental method is referred to as diversionary thinking. The theory is that by thinking about things other than sex, you’re less likely to reach the level of mental stimulation required to orgasm and ejaculate.
While some may find picturing their tax returns helpful, there is no scientific research on its effectiveness. Anecdotal evidence is all we have in support.
Some researchers have even pointed out that these techniques tend to be unsuccessful over time because they reduce pleasure overall. There’s also a downside in that it can reduce the pleasure of having sex by taking you out of the moment.
Premature ejaculation can be a frustrating, challenging issue that affects both your sex life and self-esteem. But there are treatments available.
Here’s what we know:
Sex doesn’t have to be a marathon. The average guy lasts between four and seven minutes during sex.
Preventing premature ejaculation is something that can be done at home. You can try thick condoms to decrease sensation, masturbate before sex, or use the stop-start or squeeze technique. You can also try over-the-counter remedies like desensitizing sprays and creams.
If you need more support, speak to a healthcare professional. They may prescribe medications like SSRIs or Viagra. It can also be helpful to talk to a therapist. To learn how to avoid quick discharge of sperm with medication like sertraline or other treatments, consult with a licensed healthcare provider online.
Remember, you don’t have to feel ashamed if you have PE. Talking to someone about what you’re going through is the fastest way to find a solution.
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Dr. Kelly Brown is a board certified Urologist and fellowship trained in Andrology. She is an accomplished men’s health expert with a robust background in healthcare innovation, clinical medicine, and academic research. Dr. Brown was previously Medical Director of a male fertility startup where she lead strategy and design of their digital health platform, an innovative education and telehealth model for delivering expert male fertility care.
She completed her undergraduate studies at University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill (go Heels!) with a Bachelor of Science in Radiologic Science and a Minor in Chemistry. She took a position at University of California Los Angeles as a radiologic technologist in the department of Interventional Cardiology, further solidifying her passion for medicine. She also pursued the unique opportunity to lead departmental design and operational development at the Ronald Reagan UCLA Medical Center, sparking her passion for the business of healthcare.
Dr. Brown then went on to obtain her doctorate in medicine from the prestigious Northwestern University - Feinberg School of Medicine and Masters in Business Administration from Northwestern University - Kellogg School of Management, with a concentration in Healthcare Management. During her surgical residency in Urology at University of California San Francisco, she utilized her research year to focus on innovations in telemedicine and then served as chief resident with significant contributions to clinical quality improvement. Dr. Brown then completed her Andrology Fellowship at Medical College of Wisconsin, furthering her expertise in male fertility, microsurgery, and sexual function.
Her dedication to caring for patients with compassion, understanding, as well as a unique ability to make guys instantly comfortable discussing anything from sex to sperm makes her a renowned clinician. In addition, her passion for innovation in healthcare combined with her business acumen makes her a formidable leader in the field of men’s health.
Dr. Brown is an avid adventurer; summiting Mount Kilimanjaro in Tanzania (twice!) and hiking the incredible Torres del Paine Trek in Patagonia, Chile. She deeply appreciates new challenges and diverse cultures on her travels. She lives in Denver with her husband, two children, and beloved Bernese Mountain Dog. You can find Dr. Brown on LinkedIn for more information.
Education & Training
Andrology Fellowship, Medical College of Wisconsin
Urology Residency, University of California San Francisco
M.D. Northwestern University Feinberg School of MedicineB.S. in Radiologic Science, Chemistry Minor, University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill
Published as Kelly Walker
Cowan, B, Walker, K., Rodgers, K., Agyemang, J. (2023). Hormonal Management Improves Semen Analysis Parameters in Men with Abnormal Concentration, Motility, and/or Morphology. Fertility and Sterility, Volume 118, Issue 5, e4. https://www.sciencedirect.com/journal/fertility-and-sterility/vol/120/issue/1/suppl/S
Walker, K., Gogoj, A., Honig, S., Sandlow, J. (2021). What’s New in Male Contraception? AUA Update Series, Volume 40. https://auau.auanet.org/content/update-series-2021-lesson-27-what%E2%80%99s-new-male-contraception
Walker, K., Shindel, A. (2019). AUA Erectile Dysfunction Guideline. AUA Update Series, Volume 38. https://auau.auanet.org/content/course-307
Walker, K., Ramstein, J., & Smith, J. (2019). Regret Regarding Fertility Preservation Decisions Among Male Cancer Patients. The Journal of Urology, 201(Supplement 4), e680-e681. https://www.auajournals.org/doi/10.1097/01.JU.0000556300.18991.8e
Walker, K., & Smith, J. (2019). Feasibility Study of Video Telehealth Clinic Visits in Urology. The Journal of Urology, 201(Supplement 4), e545-e545. https://www.auajournals.org/doi/10.1097/01.JU.0000556071.60611.37