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Enjoy sex like you used to
Reviewed by Mike Bohl, MD, MPH, ALM
Written by Geoffrey Whittaker
Published 03/15/2018
Updated 02/22/2024
Erectile dysfunction is commonly considered a disorder caused by physical health issues — cardiovascular conditions, age, fitness levels, etc. The reality of ED is that not all of its causes are physical — some have to do with our mental health.
In fact, your mental health may play as big a role as your physical health in your erection quality. Everything from depression and stress to performance anxiety and pornography use might affect your ability to get and maintain an erection. Luckily, there are as many effective treatments as there are potential causes. So, take a deep breath.
Below, we’ve explained how psychological factors play a role in the development of ED. We’ve also talked about what you can do to treat psychological ED and enjoy a fulfilling, satisfying sex life.
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When erectile dysfunction is related to a psychological problem, it’s referred to as psychological ED, or psychological impotence.
An estimated 30 million men in the United States are affected by ED, making it an extremely common issue. Statistics show that ED affects men of all ages, with some research suggesting that approximately 26 percent of new ED cases occur in men under the age of forty.
Those younger men are typically understood to be in better physical health. So, what gives?
Well, it’s not just about your physical health. In fact, erectile dysfunction issues are common symptoms of mental health issues like anxiety, depression and plenty of others.
In the same way you may not be able to get an erection if you’re being intimate with someone you’re not attractive to, there are plenty of other mental — psychological — blockers that can stand in the way of your sexual satisfaction.
But what are they? Well, let’s dig in.
Like with physical ED, there’s no single psychological cause that can trigger erectile dysfunction in men. Instead, a variety of issues can all cause or contribute to psychological ED, such as:
Performance anxiety
General stress and anxiety
Relationship problems
Depression
Guilt and low self-esteem
Pornography use
Some medications used to treat psychological issues, such as antidepressants, can also play a role in the development of erectile dysfunction.
Many of these triggers are closely linked, and it’s entirely possible that you could be affected by more than one at a time.
Let’s take a closer look at each potential cause to understand how it can play a role in the development of psychological ED.
In many ways, performance anxiety becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy in the bedroom. You feel nervous about being able to satisfy your partner, so when you get into the bedroom, you panic and wind up not being able to perform. It's a little “doom-loop” of sorts.
In some cases, sexual performance anxiety is triggered by negative self-talk — like if you’ve convinced yourself that you won’t be able to achieve an erection, please your partner or avoid ejaculating too early.
If you’ve found it difficult to get an erection in the past, these experiences may also stick in your mind and affect your ability to relax in the bedroom.
Though stress and anxiety are two different things, they’re closely related when it comes to the issue of erectile dysfunction.
Stress is often an underlying factor in erectile dysfunction. But over time, stress can cause anxiety, which in turn triggers more stress, creating a vicious cycle that can cause mental erectile dysfunction.
To give you some evidence of the link between anxiety, stress and ED, consider the results of a study published in 2015.
Researchers analyzed case records for 64 men with ED or premature ejaculation (PE), and found a significant link between ED and anxiety or depression. Of the 64 participants, eight had comorbid depressive disorders and 15 had anxiety disorders.
In the majority of the study participants, the mental health disorders predated the onset of sexual dysfunction, suggesting that they may have been a contributing factor.
So-called “mental block erectile dysfunction” can also lead to — or come from — relationship problems.
It could be the case that your erectile dysfunction is creating problems in the relationship — another example of the cycle of ED that can affect many different aspects of your life.
Communication is the first step in resolving this particular cause of psychological ED, but it is also one of the most difficult steps to take.
Couples counseling is a safe space for two people who love each other to get help learning to listen and find the magic again.
Have you searched, "depression erectile dysfunction" wondering if your mental health is affecting your sex life? Depression‘s most common symptoms can go beyond a persistent sad, empty mood — they can make it difficult to take pleasure in much of anything.
Yes, including sex. And the worst part is that this mental ED can affect every man in any age group.
A 1998 study, for example, found that depression-related ED was independent of aging and demographics.
Depression is far from the only mental health condition that can affect your libido — there’s also a close relationship between post-traumatic stress disorder and erectile dysfunction.
Many men who suffer from erectile dysfunction feel guilty about not being able to satisfy their partner. If the problem persists, the guilt becomes more than just a minor issue — it can often contribute to the ongoing cycle of mental ED as well.
Low self-esteem may also keep you down in more ways than one. If you don't feel confident about your sexual performance or worry that you’re not attractive enough for your partner, this can heighten your risk of sexual performance issues.
Like with many other aspects of psychological erectile dysfunction, low self-esteem and sexual performance issues often make each other worse.
In a study published in the BMJ, researchers found that erectile dysfunction can cause serious distress in men, and that this distress can have a real impact on self-esteem and the quality of relationships.
While watching porn isn’t inherently bad or harmful, excessive use of pornography may contribute to both depression and sexual performance issues such as ED.
It’s an important issue (regardless of what kind of porn you like), and our guide to pornography consumption and depression is worth reading if you’re unsure about your own relationship to porn at the moment.
Research also suggests that if you spend a lot of time watching — and masturbating to — pornography, you may develop unrealistic expectations about sex or about your sexual partners.
When this causes you to face difficulties mentally keeping a so-called “hard on,” it’s referred to as porn-induced erectile dysfunction.
This one has some psychological components and some physical components.
Although research is limited, masturbating too often may reduce your level of sexual satisfaction through something called “death grip” syndrome — being able to reach orgasm during masturbation but not during partnered sex or penetrative sex. Death grip syndrome doesn’t have a formal medical meaning, and its potential causes are manifold. In short, you get used to orgasming one way, so stimulation any other way doesn’t quite do it for you. You may also have a decrease in penile sensitivity due to how you masturbate.
The combination of porn-induced ED and death grip syndrome can affect your level of function and enjoyment from real-life sex.
If you’re physically healthy and feel worried that you may have psychological ED, the first step in making progress is to talk to your healthcare provider.
After discussing your medical history, your healthcare provider may complete a physical exam, ask you some questions, and run some tests to rule out medical causes for your ED.
In order to rule out physical ED or ED related to medical conditions, your healthcare provider may perform tests such as the following:
Complete blood count (CBC)
Fasting glucose or glycated hemoglobin (A1C)
Comprehensive metabolic profile
Thyroid-stimulating hormone
Lipid profile
Serum total testosterone
In addition to these laboratory tests, your healthcare provider may also ask you questions about your sexual desire (libido), your ability to get and maintain an erection, your ability to reach orgasm, your level of satisfaction from sexual intercourse and your general sexual satisfaction.
Based on your answers and the results of your lab tests, your healthcare provider may recommend a psychological evaluation to further explore the potential cause of your ED.
Whether you’ve talked to a healthcare professional or not, there are a few signs to look for that may suggest that your erectile dysfunction is psychological in nature:
Are you able to achieve an erection while masturbating?
Do you experience morning erections?
Are you under a lot of stress or experiencing an abnormal amount of anxiety?
Do you get nervous about pleasing your partner?
Answering “yes” to any of these questions doesn’t always mean that your ED is psychological, but it’s a sign that one or several psychological factors may play a role in your symptoms.
It’s especially important to talk to a healthcare provider if you think that your ED symptoms may have something to do with a clinical mental health issue such as anxiety or major depression.
Just like erectile dysfunction caused by physical health issues, psychological ED is almost always treatable. How to beat psychological erectile dysfunction, then, is to address the root of the problem, whether it’s a mental illness or simply feelings of guilt about sex.
The many approaches can be categorized neatly into three groups:
Medication
Therapy
Lifestyle changes
Let’s look at your options in more detail.
You should know that treating psychological ED isn’t always quite as simple as taking a tablet of sildenafil (the active ingredient in Viagra®) before sex.
Although medications like Viagra®, tadalafil (Cialis®), vardenafil (Levitra®) and avanafil (Stendra®) are effective at treating ED for many men, they're not magical cures that create libido or sexual interest — they only work when you're actually in the mood.
Most ED medications are PDE5 inhibitors that work by increasing blood flow to the soft tissues in your penis.
These drugs are designed to help with the physiological causes of ED, such as poor blood flow or damage to your nerves. They may give you a little more confidence, but they’re not going to get rid of your anxiety or other psychological causes of ED.
There are several types of therapy that can help you with performance problems. Both cognitive behavioral therapy and psychosexual therapy are approaches where a therapy professional can help you get hard (not like that), but they get you where you want to be in very different ways.
Cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) is a common depression and anxiety treatment in which a therapy provider helps to identify and change your unhealthy patterns of thinking and behavior. Research also indicates that it’s useful as a form of treatment for men with ED.
CBT operates under the understanding that your inability to achieve or maintain an erection isn’t the core problem — rather that you’re thinking about intimacy in a way that’s causing issues.
When you better understand your thought patterns, you may be able to change them in a positive way to resolve your issues.
Another option is psychosexual therapy, or sex therapy. This is a specialized form of counseling that’s designed to help you (and, in many cases, your partner) overcome sexual issues such as erectile dysfunction.
If you aren’t quite ready to talk to a therapist about your psychological ED, there are numerous alternative therapies you can try at home. These include:
Meditation. Although there’s no direct research on the effects of meditation on erectile dysfunction, studies have found that some forms of meditation may improve depression and anxiety.
Relaxation techniques. Other techniques for promoting relaxation and reducing stress, such as rhythmic breathing and guided imagery, may help you to overcome psychogenic ED and improve your sexual function.
If you suffer from psychological ED, you probably have a lot on your mind. As such, the thought of sharing your problems with your healthcare provider, let alone anyone else, might feel a little overwhelming.
It is important to realize, however, that discussing ED with your healthcare provider and partner is an important part of the healing process.
You may find that the simple act of acknowledging the issue and being honest with your partner takes some of the weight off your shoulders.
Give your partner the opportunity to ask questions to help them understand. You might even be able to give them some tips on how to get you in the mood for sex or help you when you start to experience difficulties getting or maintaining your erection.
For years, men believed that ED was a normal part of growing older — and pretty exclusively related to physical causes — but hopefully your sexual health education has now been updated to include mental causes of erectile dysfunction.
What’s next? Well, if you’re having the kind of men’s health issue related to penile performance that we’ve been talking about, you still need to rule out other causes.
Here’s your roadmap for dealing with ED:
Don’t dismiss sexual problems just because you’re young and healthy. Young men experience relationship issues and sexual problems just like older men.
Seek medical advice to rule out underlying causes like high blood pressure, heart disease, obesity, high cholesterol, low testosterone, problems with your nervous system and urology-related triggers for ED.
If you think ED could be psychological in nature, talk to your healthcare provider. They will be able to help you pinpoint the cause, and suggest treatments such as medication, if necessary.
A healthcare provider can also recommend things like psychotherapy or other mental health treatments.
We offer several FDA-approved ED medications online, which are available after a consultation with a licensed healthcare provider who will determine if a prescription is appropriate.
You can find out more about dealing with ED in our complete guide to the most common erectile dysfunction treatments and drugs.
Hims & Hers has strict sourcing guidelines to ensure our content is accurate and current. We rely on peer-reviewed studies, academic research institutions, and medical associations. We strive to use primary sources and refrain from using tertiary references. See a mistake? Let us know at [email protected]!
Dr. Mike Bohl is a licensed physician and the Director of Medical Content & Authority at Hims & Hers. Prior to joining Hims & Hers, Dr. Bohl worked in digital health at Ro, focusing on patient education, and as the Director of Scientific & Medical Content at a stealth biotech startup, working on pharmaceutical drug development. He has also worked in medical journalism for The Dr. Oz Show (receiving recognition for contributions from the National Academy of Television Arts and Sciences when the show won Outstanding Informative Talk Show at the 2016–2017 Daytime Emmy® Awards) and at Sharecare, and he is a Medical Expert Board Member at Eat This, Not That!.
Dr. Bohl obtained his Bachelor of Arts and Doctor of Medicine from Brown University, his Master of Business Administration and Master of Science in Healthcare Leadership from Cornell University, his Master of Public Health from Columbia University, and his Master of Liberal Arts in Extension Studies—Journalism from Harvard University. Dr. Bohl trained in internal medicine with a focus on community health at NYU Langone Health.
Dr. Bohl is Certified in Public Health by the National Board of Public Health Examiners, Medical Writer Certified by the American Medical Writers Association, a certified Editor in the Life Sciences by the Board of Editors in the Life Sciences, a Certified Personal Trainer and Certified Nutrition Coach by the National Academy of Sports Medicine, and a Board Certified Medical Affairs Specialist by the Accreditation Council for Medical Affairs. He has graduate certificates in Digital Storytelling and Marketing Management & Digital Strategy from Harvard Extension School and certificates in Business Law and Corporate Governance from Cornell Law School.
In addition to his written work, Dr. Bohl has experience creating medical segments for radio and producing patient education videos. He has also spent time conducting orthopaedic and biomaterial research at Case Western Reserve University and University Hospitals of Cleveland and practicing clinically as a general practitioner on international medical aid projects with Medical Ministry International.
Dr. Bohl lives in Manhattan and enjoys biking, resistance training, sailing, scuba diving, skiing, tennis, and traveling. You can find Dr. Bohl on LinkedIn for more information.
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